I think that I’m subconsciously anorexic at this point. It’s gotten so far that not eating isn’t a choice. It’s a necessity. I don’t ever wake up saying “oh I’m not going to eat today.” I just don’t.
i haven’t been able to draw for ages. i just feel so bored and uninspired which in turn makes me feel worse because i thought that even if i’m a piece of shit i could at least draw and be creative but now i can’t even do that.
and suddenly i am intensely suicidal.